Hello Beautiful Gift!
You, my friend, are an incredibly beautiful gift – even if you don’t know it! This world is a little bit brighter, a little bit happier, and a little more inspirational just by you being in it. You don’t seem to realize it, but you are an exquisite, beautiful gift, and I am thankful you are here.
Unexpected Autism
When my youngest son was little, he regressed into a bubble of autism so severely that at one point in time he stopped all speech, stopped reacting to anyone else talking, stopped responding to his name….in fact, he acted as if the outside world no longer existed.
As you can imagine, this was a very tough time filled with research, support groups, therapy, doctor appointments, and mountain ranges of anxiety. We had no idea what this meant for him, or what he would be like as he grew-up.
I loved him dearly, but I panicked about what kind of life he would have if he couldn’t connect with the outside world.
Grocery Store Wave
One day, as I was grocery shopping, something monumental happened. Jared, who was so withdrawn from the world in general, began waving at an older lady who was shopping next to me. I have no idea what about this woman grabbed his attention, but something made him want to reach out to her.
This woman looked over and saw an almost three-year-old sitting in a shopping cart waving his arm strangely and heard him utter, “ha,” which was his attempt at saying “hi.” She might have been struck with how oddly and unnaturally he waved his hand, or by how flat his tone was. Perhaps she wondered why this older toddler didn’t look her in the eyes, or how babylike he seemed.
I don’t remember how we looked, but I’m pretty sure his shirt neckline would have been stretched-out and wet because he often chewed on his shirts. And, during those days, I wouldn’t have won any beauty prizes. I was dressed, but I can’t guarantee that my hair was brushed or even that my clothes didn’t have something smeared on them. Our appearance certainly didn’t invite people to join us.
The Gift
This woman might have been rushed – I’m sure she had other things to do! But she took a moment to pause in the middle of the grocery store, look right at my boy and wave at him with a big smile.
Jared began flapping his hands excitedly, and continued to awkwardly say, “ha.”
The woman gently said, “and hi to you.” Then she wandered off down the aisle to continue her shopping.
I continued to do my own shopping, full of wonder at what I had just witnessed. I saw Jared literally, willingly pop out of his bubble of autism to engage with a stranger. This was the first time he had done this.
Tears of Joy
As I wandered down the next aisle, who should I bump into but that very same woman. To my astonishment, Jared once again began waving awkwardly at her and saying his monotone greeting. Something about this woman called to Jared’s soul. She again paused in her shopping to say hello.
Always being the ever-cool, sophisticated professional–I burst into tears. After all, I am an exhausted mother of three, grabbling with the unknown world of autism. I didn’t know if my baby would ever be able to relate to anyone outside of our family. Also, I didn’t know if the outside world would treat my baby gently or harshly.
This kind woman just handed me the most amazing gift! Over a decade later, I can still see her clearly in my mind as she laid a hand on my arm and gently uttered, “It’s a tough job. You are doing great.”
A Moment of Pause
I can guarantee that this woman had no idea the impact she made on me. With just a moment of pause and a smile on her face, she gave me immeasurable heaps of hope–something I was lacking. Hope! Can you imagine a better gift? She didn’t preach a lesson, or discuss a new therapy, or even recognize that my child was perhaps not neuro-typical. But I saw my unreachable child reach out to the world, and I saw the world react lovingly in return. What a gift! And all it cost her was a moment of pause and a smile on her face.
Your Beautiful Gift
Just like that woman still has no idea how she impacted my life, you spread joy to others around you without ever knowing it. Every time you take a moment to pause, or smile, or hold open a door for a stranger, or let someone go in front of you at the check-out line – you are a gift.
Every time you say “have a good evening”, or “Happy Thanksgiving” two days early – you are a gift.
You are a beautiful gift because you give the world hope and validation. You reach the unreachable and bring happiness, even when you don’t know you do. What an amazing power your “you-ness” is!
3 O’clock Wednesdays
Today, take a moment to celebrate what a gift you are!
- Affirmation – Think about your strengths as a caring person.
- Grace – Give yourself grace for sometimes acting like a normal human and indulging in selfishness.
- Self-Care – Take a few moments to breath deeply and focus on this thought: “I am a gift. My unique ‘me-ness’ can be used as a gift.”
New to 3 O’clock Wednesdays? See the beginning here: https://lillystrong.com/3-oclock-wednesdays/
Healing from betrayal? Follow my journey here: https://lillystrong.com/lillys-journal/
